Not of my Faith



I met my second Husband through scouting. We were both leaders and we both had sons close to the same age. I found him to be refreshingly fun and as time went by I felt like I had come home anytime I was with him. We met and were married rather quickly, which was our first mistake. Another mistake was that we didn't really discuss our different beliefs and how we would manage them before we got married. Huge mistake....he assumed I would give up my religion for his which for me wasn't something I would ever do. This caused a very big rift between us. Another really big difference was our parenting styles......I moved out so many times do to behavior I didn't want around my children. It was both good and bad. My children saw me stand up for my beliefs but it was tearing my husband and I apart. We had totally different ideas of what was right and wrong. Our moral views were different, our social views, and just about everything else. It was a total disaster. However the one thing I had a hard time letting go of was how I felt about him in my heart. I truly loved him. I tried for many years to make it work until I and my heart just couldn't handle the hurt any more. He liked to flirt and talk with other woman and when they started calling the house and leaving gifts and notes on our door I started building a wall. I tried talking to him and telling him what his behavior was doing to me but he would just make excuses and tell me I had nothing to worry about. Well to me it wasn't something to worry about....it was how it made me feel. When I finally left him I had just decided I didn't want to deal with his drama any more. Now, I am still friends with both my ex's. I believe we are all children of god and I will never give up on anyone who holds a place in my heart. However I do limit how I let them effect me and my life.

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